How very French...

  Kim wanted me to add an extra shelf to one of my home-made book shelves as her last visit to the second-hand book sale had over-stocked the storage. I didn`t have a long enough plank, so we called in at a local building materials depot, which is perhaps more used to providing larger quantities.  I had the measurements of my plank, 15cm by 2cm by a metre. You don`t go to the counter in this establishment, you seek out the wood-man in the warehouse  Did he have such a plank, I asked. Eurr, oui He walked to where a few odd lengths of wood were lying on a pallet and selected a length.  A metre long? He led the way to a huge circular saw and cut off a metre. 15cm wide? Another saw cut a strip off the side of the plank. It`s a bit thick, I thought but it would do. But no.. 2cm thick?  A third saw cut the plank down to the correct thickness.... You can pass to the caisse now, monsieur I will phone my colleague.
  The office is on the other side of the main road, really nothing to stop you driving away but I suppose nobody does. The chap behind the desk looked a bit puzzled and said he could not localise the plank in his computer, no surprise there!  Tell you what, monsieur, just pay what you think, no bill. I found a fiver in my wallet. Parfait, magnifique, au revoir, bonne journée.  France is different, isn`t it?

  Bye for now, time for bed. Night night

Death of a window cleaner

   Visiting the UK recently to see Kim and Alyson, while Kim was looking after her, I was struck by the visit of the window-cleaner with his ladder and bucket, a normal sight in Britain but completely unknown in France. When I was a youngster, the approved method of finding a little employment was to buy a ladder, a bucket and a shammy leather and set up a round of windows to clean and it is obvious this useful trade still thrives, though the price has grown since it cost five bob.
  However, the trade has never established itself in France for two very basic reasons. The first is that the country French would sooner be seen stark naked in the high street than spend good money on someone else doing what they could do for themselves free. The second reason is simple---shutters.
  Now as you can see from my header pic, all French houses have shutters fitted to their windows. A friend who visited England for the first time was flabbergasted to see that the English almost exclusively don`t have them. But how do you keep the burglars out, she asked.  How indeed.... But the fact remains that they are universal in France and as rare as hen`s teeth in the UK.
  How does this affect window cleaners, I hear you ask, after all you can open the shutters. Well, it`s like this. If you have shutters, the window MUST open inwards, otherwise you can`t lock the shutters. Therefor, all windows in France open inwards, while all in England open outwards. If your windows open outwards you can`t clean them from the inside, so any window above ground level will need a ladder. As most people are a little unsteady on ladders, the job has to be sub-contracted. In France, it`s easy-peasey, you wipe the inside, open the window and can then wipe the outside, even on first floor or higher. Think of the money you`re saving! That`s the reason that the trade of window cleaner is denied to budding French entrepreneurs!

  Bye for now going to look out of the window....
 

The Transmogrification of Mrs Noah.

   As some of you may know, Kim decided some time ago to go the whole hog in our adopted country and take out French nationality. It`s not a decision to be taken lightly but Kim felt that it was fitting for her.  She is always a person who throws herself into things. For my part, I did not feel I could take this step, not from any imperialistic pride in British nationality but because I did not feel it could be done. Being born English, a process of law could not, in my estimation, alter my essential orientation. However, I was quite prepared to support Kim`s desire to become French, and she started the process three years ago, receiving a letter from the Prefecture at the end of  August last year to confirm her change of nationality. She now has  Livret de Famille and French I.D. too!
  Let nobody tell you it`s easy!  French bureaucracy is one of the slowest in the world, and the documents and certificates required were formidable, all had to be translated into French at several Euros a page by an official translator. I suppose that the problems and delay do have the effect of discouraging any frivolous applicant, I admit I would have been tempted to tell them I had changed my mind if I had thought to join her, or even employing some stronger terms!
  However, the thing was done and dusted and she became officially French at the end of August last year. However, like the opening of a new motorway, even if it`s been open for traffic for a couple of months, there has to be a proper opening ceremony and Kim`s took place today. She was invited to come to the Prefecture at Niort to receive her official papers from the Préfêt himself, so we set out this afternoon all dressed up to attend the ceremony.
   We had a bit of a problem finding the Prefecture, although we had an address. Our Satnav is rather old and Niort has been recently refurbished in the city centre, which confused the machine. Eventually, we abandoned the car in an underground car
park and set out on foot, which would have been better if Kim`s posh shoes had been more comfortable. Still, we tracked it down in the end and entered the impressive building, being told to wait with the other new French in a tall corridor. Kim and the other candidates were called forward into another room and informed of their new rights, privileges and responsibilities. Eventually the supporters were called in as well, and the Préfêt, impressively dressed in a black suit with gold foliage on the sleeves and collar, individually handed each new compatriot their file of papers and certificates, with a few words to each. Then, he donned his round hat, also decorated with gold foliage, put on white gloves and saluted while the Marseillaise was played Then, the real business done, we were invited to step outside for a group photo and then for a few nibbles, with a non-alcoholic drink. I couldn`t help thinking we do the food and drink better in Loubillé! The ceremony itself, however,  was surprisingly effective and

Kim admits it made her feel more accepted as French afterwards.







  Bye for now, going to kiss my new French wife!